Hi everyone!

It’s almost over a year since the last time I’ve written an article here in my blog. I went back to my home country and I’m starting over again with my life plans. It’s back to square one, and right now everything seems unsure yet.

I am again aiming to live in another country but this time I am applying for a permanent residency and this process takes time. And as of now it is not yet known if my application will be granted. And I have to take some series of exams that are needed for my application. It is very exhausting not only emotionally but also financially.

At times like this, it’s easy to lost faith on your journey. Sometimes you are filled with doubt and uncertainties. Not knowing what’s next is very challenging for me. I had my ups and downs of emotions. I would do things that are out of alignment with my goals and then I would remind myself of the aspiration that I have and I would struggle to go back on track. This happens a lot of time.

As I reflected on it, I realize it was because of my fear that is causing my dilemma. I am afraid of what other people will say just in case I fail. I don’t want to disappoint my family and friends and most of all myself. You see, all my life I have been longing for a place that I will call home. I am hoping this would be my chance to finally find that place and eventually settle. I have been dreaming of seeing the Northern lights, experience deep foot snow and dive right into it. I am longing for a white Christmas and feel the atmosphere that surrounds it. I want to improve more in my communicating skills and be able to express myself fluently in English. I want to meet new people who will ignite that fire in my soul, experience things that will enlighten my consciousness and bring joy, ecstasy and rapture!

Right now I just need to keep moving forward, stay hopeful, focus on my goals and face my fears. I know there will be more challenging times ahead of me. It’s part of my journey but I will keep my faith knowing that these things will eventually materialize, not on my own accord but when the time is right. And just in case I fail at least I’ve tried my best and will have no regrets in the future knowing that I keep a good fight.

I want to apologize for the times that I became idle. I keep everything to myself and stop publishing my articles. At some point I lost any motivation to write anymore. Thank you for still keeping up with me and for your time to read my writings. I promise to keep you posted and that there will be more articles coming up.

Love you all!

Janice